The inspiration to have a life

These powerful words come from Ann one of RSVP’s inspiring clients.

I would like to speak not only to say how RSVP has helped me, but thousands of other survivors in lots of different ways.

I myself came to this wonderful organisation at the age of 59 years. From the age of 3 I had suffered abuse and pain. The feeling of being alien made me deal with the feeling of being ashamed, that you smell, and are dirty, evil and ugly. Then the mind games start. Who would believe a stupid little girl? Then as you get older the flashbacks, feeling you think people can see what is going on not only in your head but in your body too. You think all the badness is visible and the smell from the badness inside of you. You believe this so much, you think ‘if I am fat and ugly no-one will like me’ but that does not work. I was wrong, so once again I punished myself.

At the age of 3 my own dad would touch me and tell me this is what daddies do with their little girls and it is okay. Then as I got older my brother would do the same but wanted to do more things, things I never thought were possible. Then when I reached 12 years old I was held down by some boy and a so called friend and raped. Then I started my monthlies and I thought I was going to die.

Then the time of having to live with my brother and sister- in – law where they both abused me, threatening me so bad that I wanted to die. As a teenager I was raped for 24 hours by a man just let out of prison. I could not tell anyone because they would blame me, ‘the ugly little alien’ who only has one purpose in life.

Now with the help of such a wonderful organisation as RSVP I have been given a life, where I am never judged, never looked down on. To know I can share my feelings and not feel bad about it. I always thought it was my problem, why does anyone else need to know?

RSVP from receptionists, office staff, managers, counsellors, CEO Lisa, Sally Chairperson and not forgetting the trustees and fundraisers, they have all played a part in me realising I have a life and a voice. I am now a person with feelings. Thanks to counselling and social groups I no longer feel alone, now knowing I don’t need to hide anymore and having a right to show my feelings.

The greatest thing is knowing RSVP treat all their clients and members of staff and volunteers with respect and understanding, and are sympathetic, non-judgemental not only to myself but to everyone they come into contact with, making everyone’s feelings count.

I would like to say thank you to one and all who support so many people like myself. To make me understand others actions should not stop me having a life.

Thank you from so many SURVIVORS. Keep up the great job of helping so many others like myself.